Wicked Witch Of The West confesses to Foot/Slipper Fetish

28 Sep


A Special Report By Grimm Report Roving Yellow Brick Road Reporter, Michael Fuller
Mumblings From Beyond

According to her tearful confession to Julie Chen, the Wicked Witch Of The West may have indeed left OZ, but it seems OZ in more ways than she could ever have imagined had not left her. The ugly, heart-breaking tale spilled out about the death of her sister. How a house was randomly dropped on her, her quest for revenge against Dorothy Gale and her enabling friends, Tin Man, Scarecrow, and Cowardly Lion.

Then, like an atomic bomb, the Wicked Witch Of The West revealed that revenge was not her only motive. It seems the post-traumatic stress disorder she has was expressing itself in a slipper and shoe fetish, which recently has morphed itself to include a foot fetish. It seems everyone has always assumed that it was because of Dorothy’s slippers. It turns out The Wicked Witch Of The West had suffered a irrational desire to posses the slippers in a way that even she could not comprehend.

Those very desires turned themselves into random slipper, shoe and foot tweeting (now being called Shweeting, and Footing) of unsuspecting high profile celebrity’s (and a unnamed foreign dignitary).

Like Charlie Sheen, Lindsay Lohan, and Justin Bieber, the Wicked Witch Of The West now found herself the subject matter of every late night talk show comedian. Once she started to be chased by paparazzi on a daily basis, having to dive behind bushes and run away with hands full of stolen slippers and shoes, she knew it was time to seek some much needed help.

There will be a special edition of the DR. OZ show featuring her heart-wrenching story, focusing on shoe, slipper, and foot addiction while following up with her recovery.



One Response to “Wicked Witch Of The West confesses to Foot/Slipper Fetish”

  1. belasbrightideas 09/28/2013 at 8:28 pm #

    Ahhh … the mystery unravels …

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