House Panel To Grill Turkey Over Presidential Pardon

21 Nov
Image by wattpublishing

Image by wattpublishing

The House Of Representatives Oversight Committee will hold a hearing over the Presidential Pardon of a Thanksgiving Turkey. Committee Chair, Congressmen Darrell Issa is demanding to be kept abreast as to why the President should be allowed to unilaterally select a turkey for pardon without the advice and consent of Congress. Democrats are calling foul over this latest flap. They assert that Republicans only wish to subject the turkey-in-question to a feast of right wing smear tactics, complete with cranberry sauce.

Still, others are beginning to question whether or not President Obama should continue the longstanding tradition of issuing Presidential Pardons for Thanksgiving Turkeys, fearing the act promotes a vegetarian lifestyle. On Monday, Rush Limbaugh accused the President of doing just that on his radio show. “You’ve seen him and the First Lady planting vegetables on the White House lawn. But you don’t see them raising turkeys. I bet they’re both vegan.”

In an attempt to fend off the accusations of vegetarianism, the White House released a photo of President Obama consuming a Buffalo wing at last years Super Bowl party. MSNBC White House Correspondent, Chuck Todd was first to report that chicken, “Is clearly NOT turkey.” He then interviewed Congressmen Brian Higgins (R) NY to analyze the image. Rep. Higgins went on to express that not only was the President misleading the American public by confusing turkeys with Buffalo wings, he believed that the image in question was not even that of the Western New York delicacy. “You can clearly see that the chicken wing in question is covered in BBQ sauce, not Buffalo sauce. And what is that, ranch or blue cheese? How can Americans trust this guy?”

To show they are not vegetarians, several red state Democratic Party members have worked across the aisle with Senate Republicans to pass a bill written by Senator Joe Manchin of West Virginia. If the bill is approved in the House Of Representatives it would open up the Rose Garden to turkey shoots. The bill sailed through the senate, but is currently facing fierce opposition from Tea Party Republicans in the House following President Obama’s endorsement of the idea.

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8 Responses to “House Panel To Grill Turkey Over Presidential Pardon”

  1. Erika Beebe 11/21/2013 at 8:01 pm #

    I love the play on words in this one. “Abreast,” and “foul over this latest flap.” Brilliantly done. :0)

  2. Ned's Blog 11/22/2013 at 2:03 am #

    I was worried this turkey bit my get overdone. Not at all. Well done! I mean that in a juicy humor kind of way 😉

  3. cat9984 11/22/2013 at 8:27 pm #

    Congratulations on avoiding the obvious turkey/politician jokes.

    • grimmreport 11/23/2013 at 6:14 am #

      Oh, they make that one on there own. No need to embellish. Cheers!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. US Presidential profiles in violations of Justice. (Part 6 – former President Carter, the exception) | We dream of things that never were and say: "Why not?" - 11/22/2013

    […] House Panel To Grill Turkey Over Presidential Pardon (grimmreport.com) […]

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